My 2020: A Year For Finding Direction In My Creative Business
I entered 2020 like all of us, unaware of what would soon come to dominate our year. I knew it was going to be my first year of running a creative business, not that it would almost instantly be affected by something as big as the pandemic.
It has been quite the year, and as always around this time I look back and think about what really happened. How the year unfolded and what I’ve learned. It’s always helpful to zoom out and reflect, and now I’d like to share what has emerged.
A hopeful beginning
When January 2020 rolled around, I was close to launching my coaching packages. I had worked with a couple of clients for free since November 2019 and it had been going really well - I had enjoyed it, my confidence was growing and my clients were happy.
I had no idea how hard or easy it would be to actually sell coaching packages though. My free spots had booked up quickly, but they were free. Would the interest stick when people had to pay for it? I was nervous but excited to get started for real, after years of dreaming of turning my blog into a creative business.
I chose the word Wholehearted for 2020. I wanted to enter my first year of business wholeheartedly, to give it my all and not hold myself back. I set two goals for myself:
To bring to life a business that I love.
To send my first novel to publishers.
I vividly remember that January 1st 2020 had a spectacular sunset. It was the start of a new decade, the start of my journey as a business owner and it felt truly magical.
In the end of January, I launched my coaching packages and officially started my business. I quickly booked a client and was satisfied with that. My fiancé and I celebrated with a dinner at a nice restaurant. Thinking back, it must have been the last one before the pandemic hit.
On unsteady ground
Things were going pretty well for a while, until mid February. I had then worked with the client I had booked when I launched and was finishing up with the last of my free clients.
I started getting stressed. I felt I was supposed to be booking clients, but I didn’t know what to do to make that happen. At the same time, I was creating my guide Four Seasons of Creative Work, which I wanted to launch in time for March. And I was editing my novel, which I thought had dragged on for too long and should be with my beta readers by then. And of course, working my 9-5 job.
Finally, after feeling stressed and anxious for a while, I hit the breaks. I realised much of my stress stemmed back to a very familiar fear of failure, a failure I thought would definitely happen because I secretly didn’t fully believe I could make it as a business owner.
I spent some time dealing with these thoughts and intentionally shifted my focus from getting results fast, to leaning into the joy of the process of building my business (shared in this blog post). I also decided to postpone launching Four Seasons of Creative Work until the end of the year, and by early March I felt on track again.
And then, of course, covid-19 hit.
By mid-March I was writing email letters titled “creating within a crisis” and working my day job from home, something I would keep doing for the rest of the year. Talking about my coaching packages now felt a bit weird, when everyone was trying to find a new normal within the pandemic.
And so followed a couple of months when everything was unsteady and uncertain. I was trying to figure out who I was as a coach and business owner, and how to live within the pandemic at the same time.
Slowly, things got a little clearer and easier. I finished my novel edits and sent the draft to my beta readers. In May, I finally booked my second coaching client and I worked on my coaching structure.
Finding my feet
Summer came and I can see how this is when things started to shift for me. The first half of 2020 was unsteady and I felt self-conscious and uncertain. In the second half, I started to find my feet and a bit of confidence in myself and my business. One big part in this happened in June, when something that had been simmering in the back of my mind all year surfaced.
Since I started my business, I had been unsure about how to keep sharing my own creative journey and felt that calling myself “creative coach” was a bit restricting. I shared my thoughts on my creative identity in a blog post, deciding that I would call myself writer first, coach second.
Looking back, I can see that it was never really about what I call myself. This was me dealing with what I thought I had to be to be a “good coach”. It was me finding my identity as a creative coach and business owner, carving out my own role. Stating for myself that I wouldn’t just do what I thought I should do, but that I was finding my own way.
My trend of taking control continued during the summer vacation from my day job. I gave my website a makeover and did something I had not planned for at all - I started a Youtube channel. It was a decision that came both out of joy and need. I needed a medium to talk more directly through, to strengthen connection and also give people a better example of what coaching with me could be like. And videography felt joyful and creative, so that’s what I decided to pursue.
From September I went down to working my day job four days a week instead of five, giving me Fridays in addition to the weekend to work on my business. I booked new clients and also worked with Kayte Ferris to get a better grip on marketing and business. I finally finished my novel manuscript and sent it to publishers in hopes of a positive response (agents doesn’t really exist in Sweden).
I spent much of autumn in a focused state. I clarified my methods of how I help creatives move forward through finding their direction, route and courage. I searched for my style in making videos. I created my new free guide Your Next Step and completed Four Seasons of Creative Work.
I ended 2020 feeling a little wiped by everything that the year brought with it, but overall pleased with the progress I’d made. I have brought to life a small creative business that I really love, and my novel’s fate is still being decided by publishers. It’s been a weird year, but not an altogether bad one.
A year for finding direction in my creative business
When I began 2020, I quietly hoped the year would bring me further in my creative business journey than it have. At the same time, I secretly didn’t believe I could make it as a business owner.
My creative year has turned out like reality often does, somewhere between my hopes and fears. (Not talking about the pandemic here - that is beyond anything I could ever imagine.)
I didn’t understand in the beginning of the year how much would change when I shifted from blogging to running a business. I guess I’d heard enough stories of bloggers who began selling things and the transition sounded very smooth. I even described it as I was “adding a business side” to what I do online.
For that reason, much of this year has been about finding my direction in my creative business. Finding myself, as a coach and business owner. Finding my focus and methods. Then, my route forward and confidence has slowly followed, guiding me into 2021 with a level of clarity I didn’t have when 2020 began.
If you are looking to reflect on your 2020, you might want to check out my guide Four Seasons of Creative Work. It begins with end of the year reflections and it’s what I’ve used in my own review of 2020.
Save this blog post on Pinterest
