The Dream Of Writing
For as long as I can remember, I've wanted to write. Growing up, my bookworm mom fed me with stories to read, and my best friend's mother was a children's book author. Together, my friend and I nurtured the dream of one day writing our own books.
A couple of weeks ago, one of my coaching clients told me she wanted to start working on a book. She's an artist and doubts her writing skills, but she admitted that she had been dreaming of writing a book for some 10 years now, and she wanted my help to finally get started with it.
After our conversation, I got to thinking. I'm helping two clients get started with book projects this summer and another with a tv series script. I've gotten emails and messages from a whole gang of creatives thinking of starting their own blog. Looking back, I've coached fiction and non-fiction writers, and even the artists I've worked with have had some kind of writing dream in the shape of a blog or newsletter.
I've never intentionally tried to target writers, but it seemed many of the people who are attracted to my work wants to write. So I put up a poll on my Instagram stories asking “do you have a writing dream?”
95% hit yes.
Why we dream of writing
Surveys say that about a third of the Swedish population wants to write a book. That's a crazy amount of people with writing dreams. Most know that it’s hard work and writing isn't a particularly lucrative endeavour. Still we dream. Why?
While everyone has their own personal motivation, I think there are three common reasons.
First of all, we know how books can make us feel. People can declare the book dead all they want, but many of us have read books that changed our lives. Whether we’re part of the Harry Potter generation, found our creative courage through Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert or fell in love with the words of Mary Oliver, books can leave deep marks. We loved that feeling, and we want to recreate it. We want to contribute to the world that which it gave us.
Second of all, we humans are social creatures, even us introverts. Writing is a way of communicating with the world, on your own terms. You get to tell your own stories, share your ideas and show your perspective on life. You can connect with others who think and feel the same. Writing is a way to express yourself uninterrupted and deliberate, and it can be deeply meaningful for both the writer and the reader.
Finally, we simply love to write. We love dreaming up our own stories, to find flow and play with sentences. We love cosying up with a laptop and a cup of tea, slip into our ideas and let our fingers dance over the keyboard. We humans aren't just social, we are imaginative. We love to create. Without creativity, the world would look very different.
Why we still struggle to write
While many dream of writing, fewer write. Of course, there are many writers in the world, more than the publishing houses can accept, but for every book that gets written I’ll bet you there are at least ten that doesn’t.
So why, when so many of us dream of writing, do we still struggle?
Again, the reasons are many. We lack habits, we can’t pick an idea, we struggle with procrastination. But at the heart, I think it’s this. We don’t believe in our own writing, in our ideas, in our ability to turn them into a good story and in the value of our work.
And we might think, well isn’t it true? Does the world really need another writer? Another book? Another poor soul pouring their hearts and life minutes into pages that agents and publishers will only glance at and then reject?
The world may not need more books, but writers need to write. And while a goal for many, getting published is just one part of being a writer. If the only point with writing was to get published, then why do I still consider writing my first novel one of the best things I’ve done in my life, when it hasn’t gotten accepted by a publisher (yet)? Why do so many writers find meaning and joy in their writing, regardless of whether they get a publishing deal or not?
While there might not be space for all books in the publisher's offices, I firmly believe there is space in the world for all creatives and all writing dreams.
Making the dream a reality
When I started working on my first novel, I struggled immensely. I had gotten hung up on the belief that I was only going to be allowed to be a writer if I got a book published. This might be because of the unhelpful Swedish language: there is a word for author, for journalist, for blogger, for someone who writes in magazines and newspapers. But there is no word for the one who writes without publishing.
Here, the English language came to the rescue. A writer is someone who writes. That’s it. And as long as I write, I get to call myself a writer. (I at this point I even got myself a necklace with the word “writer” on it. Thank you, English.)
So how do we pursue the dream of writing, when we struggle to believe in our ideas, stories and our ability to write them? When we feel scared of hitting the publish button on a blog post, or get overwhelmed by there mere thought of writing a whole book?
Well, we start by writing. We allow all our flaws to come along for the ride, we trust that the ideas we have will lead us somewhere good, we keep digging and learning and believing that the story is there, inside of us, wanting to come out. We build habits, plaster our walls with post it notes and buy mugs that say “go away I’m writing”. We believe that the hours and hours of writing we do actually matters, most of all to ourselves but also to the world. And we love the crap out of it.
I know it’s easier said than done. After all, it took me 10 years to write my first novel, involving two thrown out drafts, a big stack of books on creativity and writing, and a full year facing my creative fears. I know how hard it can be. But I also know that the dream of writing is a dream worth fighting for.
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